Friday, May 16, 2014

247.0... Let's Be Honest

I have written or often talked about people not being honest with themselves.  With few exceptions, I believe this to be true when I hear people say they are working out and eating right and can't seem to lose any weight.  I think these people aren't being entirely honest with themselves.  

Some aren't working out as hard as they say.  I see this every night at the club.  Those people who go and then 'pretend' to work out.  They wander around the gym.  They do a few reps at a weight that doesn't challenge them.  They walk on the treadmill at a slow pace and get off after 5 minutes.  They talk to everyone in the gym and then leave 60 minutes later after working out for 10 minutes.

Some aren't eating as well as they say.  They 'forget' all of the little things they pick at throughout the day.  That handful of cashews.  That candy bar.  That soda.  All of those things that we eat when not actually sitting down to eat a meal.  

Some know exactly what they eat yet don't understand what is good or bad for you.  They eat a salad with ranch dressing, hard boiled eggs, bacon bits, and cheese and think they are eating good.  They drink their calories and never count them.

Some people know what is good and bad but don't understand what 4 ounces of meat looks like.  They don't know what 2 tablespoons looks like.  

Some of these people are lying to themselves.  Some of them aren't aware of the error in their ways.  I would like to believe that over the last four years I have tracked and monitored my food and exercise to a degree that I should be an expert at it.  I would like to think that all of this label reading and measuring of food would prohibit me from ever lying to myself.  Unfortunately, even armed with that experience, I am no different and just as capable of being dishonest. 

For some reason, I have had a hard time getting back in to the habit of logging all of my food in myfitnesspal.com.  That might be because of the overconfidence instilled in me from four years of this journey.  I think I know.  I think I am being honest.  And, I thought I would be about the same or down slightly this morning.  I knew I had indulged in a piece of cheesecake.  But, thought that the rest of the day made up for it.

Well, I lied.  I didn't enter anything in MFP.  And, I misjudged what I had eaten.  So, after being grumpy and confused all day, I decided to recap yesterday.  Not because I needed proof that I had done something wrong.  But, to truly know exactly what it was that I had done wrong.  I was wondering if I needed to eat more calories or less.  Silly Anthony.

So, I tried to remember everything I had eaten yesterday.  I never really sat down and ate a meal.  I simply picked at food all day long while at work, when at home, while at my cousin's funeral, and while visiting Lori's parents.  If you had asked me to guess at my caloric intake, i would have guessed between 1,500-1,600.  More than my goal.  But, easily within a range that should leave my weight flat to Thursday.  When I was done tallying the damage, it totaled almost 2,100 and I can't even guarantee that it included everything.  Add to it that a much shorter walk around the neighborhood late last night and I finally realized that I had earned every tenth of the 0.4 I had gained.

I need to stop being resistant to all of the things that helped me last time.  They worked.  And, they will work again.  I need to embrace them.  Daily.

Here's to always being honest with yourself...

Starting weight (this time): 278.4
Current weight: 247.0
Change from previous: +0.4
Total: (31.4)
Total Days: 102

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