Saturday, August 27, 2011


Down .4 yesterday morning and another 1.8 today.  I haven't been 214 in almost a month.  Feeling better each day and anxious to get back to 210.  Leaving now to pick up my new bicycle... an activity that I used to love and haven't done in many years.  Looking forward to getting back on the road!

Thursday, August 25, 2011


Why do my bad days seem to cause bigger changes than my good days?

Wednesday, August 24, 2011


Down .6 pounds.  Under 215 for the first time in 29 days!  Down 8 pounds in 8 days.  And, I can already tell how much better I feel physically.  Although I have been barely under a couple of times, it has really been since May 13 since I have been under 210.  That was the day that I made a huge jump from 205.2 to 211.6 after eating way too much at a Rockies' game.  What I thought I would and could correct quickly now looks like a 4 month project. 

Monday, August 22, 2011


I needed a number like that!  Down 4.2 pounds after a great day and feeling better.  Lower than my pre-weekend weight and 7.2 pounds lower than last Tuesday's weight.  That's a good six day period and, though I am hesistant to even write this, I feel like I have my mojo back.  When I get back under 200, I will accept some five pound swings.  But, I never want to do a 25 pounds swing again!

Sunday, August 21, 2011


Not a great Saturday.  But, today was an awesome day and I am kind of hoping for one of those 3+ pound days tomorrow.

Saturday, August 20, 2011

Friday, August 19, 2011


No change yesterday.  Back under 220 this morning.  I would like to stay there this time.  Hard to believe that I am now just trying to get to 215 again... then to 210... then to 205...  feels like I have done this before...

Wednesday, August 17, 2011


Despite a birthday lunch with my friends from work at my favorite Chinese buffet, I was still down 2.2 pounds.  While not great at the buffet, I did manage to show some control... though I still would have bet on a MSG and sodium weight gain.  But, a small dinner and a workout kept that buffet at bay.  That was a good start to this day.  All of the obligatory bad meals are out of the way and my business trip that was to start today has been cancelled. 

Tuesday, August 16, 2011


Because Lori works tonight, we celebrated my birthday last night and she made me an awesome spaghetti and meatballs dinner... something I hadn't had for some time.  It was incredible!  Lori made me promise that I wouldn't be mad at her when I woke up this morning after consuming way too many spaghetti, meatballs, Pueblo chiles, and garlic bread.  So, as promised, I am not mad at her.  I did not make the same promise about myself and my disgust with myself grows daily.  I actually had a small part of me wonder  how many days I would keep posting my weight if I failed to turn this ship around and kept gaining.  Well, I hope to not have to make that decision. 

Monday, August 15, 2011

500... Well, Actually 524

Lost in all my whining and less-than-blog-worthy eating habits over the last couple of months is the fact that I have never stopped exercising.  The streak still continues.  On July 22, I hit the 500 day mark.  Five hundred straight days of exercise!  Today, I actually hit 524. 

That streak might be the only reason I am not 250 pounds today and I am glad that I have it to fall back on.  I still look forward to my daily exercise and plan to continue extending this streak until the day that I find it physically impossible.  Here's to never seeing the day when the streak ends...


Yes, I was over 220 today.  And, I feel like crying.  Just because you don't offer up any more excuses for your bad behavior doesn't necessarily lead to an end of that bad behavior.  I need to change something because now my weight is once again effecting my mood... which is pretty foul this morning.

Thursday, August 11, 2011

No More Excuses... Quit Your Whining Cry Baby!

I started this post about six weeks ago.  Like my recent weight-loss efforts, blogging efforts, and general life intentions, I never finished.  My actual malaise started long before that, about six weeks earlier.  So, this funk I have been in has lasted approximately three months!  Shame on me...

It started in the middle of May when the canvas top of my convertible was ripped open at a local baseball field.  It's a horrible feeling of violation when your property is vandalized and the worst part is having to deal with the repairs.  The next day, a friend of my father's called and told me that my dad had suffered a heart attack the night before.  After a couple of days of updates, I decided that it was bad enough that I needed to fly to Florida to be with him.  That 10 day trip turned in to 19 days when my dad passed away the day before I was to return home.  Yet, despite all of that, I never let myself wallow in any self pity.  I helped my dad while he was alive and then worked on taking care of his estate afterwards.  I stayed busy and I think that helped. 

The day after I got back home after a long drive from Florida with my son, I decided to walk to the club for a run... my car was still in the shop from the events that took place before my trip down South.  On my way, I was attacked by two angry and agressive boxers.  After several blows to each of them and a couple of kicks, they finally turned away and ran off.  My heart was racing and, for the first time, I had a moment where I felt sorry for myself.  A moment where I questioned what I had done wrong to deserve the bitch-slap that karma was putting on me.  As I continued to the club, I felt tired, mentally worn out, and a little bit stressed.  Of course, none of that kept me from rushing to the club.  The club was closing in 45 minutes and I quickly brushed past the people who wanted to know what had happened.  I still needed to get my run on!

When I returned to work, I continued to feel stress as I realized that all of the progress I had made towards transitioning in to my new role at work had taken a huge step backwards by missing close to three weeks.  Couple that with an internal audit that was going on that involved my old job, and the stress was compounded. 

While all of this was going on, I continued to work on all of the necessary details of dealing with my dad's estate and the financial burden while we wait on funds to be disbursed from various sources. 

I started to eat poorly.  I started to gain weight.  I started to drink soda.  I started to eat popcorn at work.  I started all of the bad habits that I had worked so hard to stop.  Of course, as I gained weight and continued to feel crappy from my poor eating, the stress only increased.  I felt more stressed, more overwhelmed, more unorganized, and more chaotic than I ever had in my whole life. 

And then it hit me, not only was I feeling stressed, but I was talking about it.  I was whining to people.  I was sharing my stress with anyone who would listen.  In fact, I had become a whiny little bitch.  I never wanted to be that person.  I never wanted to feel sorry for myself.  I never wanted for anybody else to feel sorry for me either.

But, then I could tell by the tone of my friends and family as they started talking to me in worried tones with some concern that I was feeling sorry for myself.  I was eating poorly and justifying it with the excuse that I was stressed.  Telling myself that I would get busy again once my life was in order.  Yet, I wasn't changing anything.  I was still whining.

Well, I am done whining.  I won't promise that I will be 200 by a certain date.  But, I will promise that I am not going to feel sorry for myself any longer.  I am not going to keep usng this as an excuse.  I am trying to remember how much easier every day was when I felt as good as I did at 200 pounds.  How rested I felt after sleeping well.  How much positive energy I had when putting on clothes and feeling good about the way I looked.  I want to be that guy again.

I feel like yesterday was a turning point.  Not sure why I think it will stick this time.  I know I have thought this a couple times over the last three months.  But, I know I stopped myself as I reached for the popcorn and went towards the soda machine at work today.  Tomorrow, I will start using again to track calories.  While I am pretty sure I know how much most things are now, I think there is value in the tracking process that serves as a reminder.  I will attempt to write in this blog, besides the morning  weights, at least three times a week.  I will attempt to feel deserving when people tell me that I look great... because I haven't for the last two months.  I will go back to living my life with the positive energy that I have always strived for. 

Thanks to those who have put up with my whining.  Thanks for those who have lended an ear. I apologize to all of you for making you listen.  I apologize for not being the person who people wanted to read about.  I apologize to my followers on this blog for not being very inspirational.  Here's to being inspirational...


Down 1.8.  Today is a new day!

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Monday, August 8, 2011


Another crappy weekend kicked off by a trip to Souper Salad on Friday night.  Souper Salad is one of those chains, like Soup Plantation and Sweet Tomatoes, where people get to eat a lot of food at a buffet under the guise of eating "salad".  Let's go to a salad bar!  It's definitely a great way to lie to yourself.  After consuming pizza, tacos, bread, high-caloric dressings and toppings, ice cream, etc., you are left wondering how you could have gained weight and eaten 4,000 calories at a salad place.  Although we stayed very active all weekend, I finished the weekend with another buffet yesterday.  So, after promising that I would never eat buffets again, I managed to bookend my entire weekend with them. 

Friday, August 5, 2011


Down .8, that's the good news.  The bad news is that I fully expected a great weekend because we were going backpacking.  But, we decided to rest our bodies after some busy weekends.  Instead, we planned a weekend of riding our new bikes that we planned to pick up last night.  Well, Lori got hers.  But, mine was the wrong size.  So, no bikes either.  So, this leaves me to find another activity to burn lots of calories and keep my mind off food.  Wish me luck...

Thursday, August 4, 2011

Wednesday, August 3, 2011


Up .4 pounds after another dinner out.  What makes this really bad is that I didn't even enjoy the restaurant yet I still ate enough to gain weight!

Tuesday, August 2, 2011


I am not even sure what happened to Thursday's update.  Maybe I was just tired of posting depressing numbers.  But, I really don't recall skipping.  Friday I weighed.  But, woke up early to cimb a fourteener and didn't get a chance to post.  Saturday and Sunday I was out of town with no internet connectivity.  And yesterday...  well, yesterday was just flat out depressing when I saw 219.4... which was still better than what I saw Sunday night! 

No more Phase 3.  Not that I am done trying.  Just tired of talking about it like I need a phase or some goofy acronym will help me lose weight.  The irony of me not posting is that I have been wanting to post more.  So, there will be a flurry of posts soon including the recap of our climb on Friday. 

Now I attempt to make good on my conversation with my friend Will about getting to 200  in 60 days.  What I thought I could do in 30 may end up being difficult to achieve in 60!  Baby steps...